I need SHOUT OUT LOUD!!!

Lord I need to Shout out LOUD!!!! THings driving me crazy or i should say i driving myself crazy!! i need a counselor or maybe a psychology doctor!!! I really going nuts very soon! I think i got this depression! Now every single things that drive me nuts is my family and i guess mostly is myself! I'm the biggest enemy to myself! How can i save and control myself?
I really very very very very very very very very very very very very very CONFUSE and LOST!~!!! I CAN"t Stand this kind if life anymore!!! I feel like run away... escape from everything!!! I really gonna kill myself very soon!!!!
AARRrggghhhhh... why no one can help me at all!!! I hate this kind of feelings and life right now!!!! I really feel like i'm wasting my time!!! AArrggghhh....just dunno what i should do! PLEASE HELP ME!!!! LORD I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP. YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON CAN HELP AND GUIDE ME THROUGH THIS DARKNESS. YOU ARE ALSO ThE ONLY ONE CAN GIVE ME LOVES! I REALLY NEED YOU BADLY!!!!

PLEase HEavenly Father Show me Miracle!!! I can't breath and take this any longer!!! I wan to be rational and be someone You wan me to be. I believe being like this is not something You want me to be. Lord i beg you... help me.. provide me things that i need! PLEASEE...plssssss... LORD JESUS i need You to provides me! AMEN!!!